Love and Duty
Paolinus anger smouldered throughout the
afternoon. He understood the impetus behind Aelia's actions, but he could not
forgive them. He had always considered her to be an intelligent and- far more
important in a woman- a practical girl. His disappointment in her deportment
was almost as acute as his rage. But, could he really send her away? He mulled
over his options, stewing because he had to make a choice.
The knock on the front door took him by
surprise. It was late....His hand shook slightly. It was about Publius. He must
have died.
Steeling himself, Paolinus went to the door.
"Good evening, sir."
It was Maximus' little serving boy. The rain
has started again, and he was shivering in his sodden cloak. "I have a
message from the liutenant... he told me to wait for a reply."
Paolinus nodded and let the boy inside.
"Paolina!" He called up the stairs.
After a moment, his daughter appeared.
"Yes, tata?"
"A letter from Maximus."
She hurried down the stairs, plucking the missive
from Cicero's hands and tearing open its seal.
"What is it?" Paolinus asked, after
a moment of silence.
"The emperor has arrived at camp."
her eyes widened as she continued to read. "Since the General is still
away, Maximus must remain there in charge....we've been invited to dinner with
Marcus Aurelius!" Her tone was full of disbelief. "All of us, you me
Aelia - at least..." abruptly, her face fell. "Quintus' father has
arrived as well...along with Fulvia, his intended bride."
Paolinus nodded. Well, it was settled.
"Send a reply. Tell him that we will
accept." He turned to the servant. "Three for dinner."
"But, tata! Aelia- "
"Aelia must learn a lesson."
23
The following day the girls whiled away most
of the afternoon arranging their hair and clothing themselves in the finest of
Aelia's silken dresses. The tension between Aelia and Paolinus was still thick-
her future had yet to be decided, but she seemed to entirely miss out on the
fact that her attendance at the dinner was supposed to be a sort of punishment.
Aelia was joyous merely to be seeing Quintus again- she had grown so used to
hopelessness that physical confrontation with the new wife was only a marginal
increase to her burden. The part of her that had existed before the pair had
met- the joyful girl in love with jewels and silk and Rome, was also aflutter.
To eat dinner with the emperor! At last her manners would face their ultimate
test.
All told, Paolina was much more nervous about
the engagement. Would she be viewed as a suitable wife to Maximus? She was
certain, in her heart, that he would someday be general himself. Perhaps the
Emperor would disapprove of such a provincial spouse...perhaps he had his eye
on a more politically beneficial partner from Rome. She squirmed nervously as Aelia's
skilled fingertips smoother her inky curls above her head.
"There." She said, at last, as the
last comb was slid into place.
"Not yet." Aelia chided, she
reached onto the dresser and retrieved a carved fruitwood box. Inside, sitting
on a velvet lining, we Paolina's most precious gems- the one item she had that
she knew Aelia coveted. A strand of pearls. Whiter than the ones in Aelia's
bulla, and most of them nearly round. The sea town where they had passed their
honeymoon was developing quite an industry in the gems. Paolina had not known how much they cost when she
admired them in a shop window by the sea. When Maximus presented them to her on
the night before they left, she had been overwhelmed by his attentiveness in
listening for what she had desired. It was only much later, when Aelia had
exclaimed over them, and Paolinus had stared, aghast, that she learned the
necklace had cost her husband most of her dowry. They meant even more to her
then- not because they were costly, but because they said, without words, that
Maximus had chosen her for herself alone- not for the lands that she had
brought him, or money....
Aelia checked the knot between each stone
carefully, and then she clasped it around her cousin's neck.
"There." She breathed happily.
"The empress herself could not be as lovely."
Paolina looked at her reflection and had to
smile. Nearly back to her old self, Aelia was once again a miracle-worker. The
pearls frames a perfectly made-up face. Just a hint of rouge to accent her
olive skin. Kohl-rimmed eyes that accented her wide dark orbs, and
cherry-stained lips in a perfect bow. Her hair was also well-coiffed. Aelia had
left a section of curls in the back loose, and had gathered the sides into
intricate braids and twists held in place with abalone combs. Her dress,
borrowed from Aelia's thriftily accumulated collection, was navy-blue silk,
offset with gleaming gold-coated pins at the shoulders, and a creamy cranberry
colored shawl.
"Girls!" Paolinus shouted up the
stairs. "The carriage is here!"
With a squeal, Aelia reached for a scent
bottle, dusting her cousin, then herself with the rose-scented water, and then
they raced down the stairs.
Their eyes widened with delight at the
conveyance that had been sent for them. It was the empress's own. It was a
huge, black-lacquered box that seemed far too large for the team of six black
stallions which pulled it. Inside, there were richly upholstered couches
instead of seats, a bowl of fruit, and even a little desk.
The luxury of their surroundings had barely
sunken in before they arrived at the camp. They did not stop at the gates,
which swung open at their arrival, they continued on, along the wide road at
its center, to the Praetorium. At last, the hulking cart trundled to a stop.
With a loud rap, one of the Praetorian guards announced that they had stopped.
The door was opened, and a lamp lowered for them to depart.
Paolinus stepped out and Fulvia was the first
thing that he saw. He felt a little bit sheepish- his desire to punish Aelia had
faded during the night, but then she had actually seemed excited about
accompanying them and, after all that had happened, he did not have the heart
to tell her "no". It cheered him a bit, however, to see how the other
woman's appearance paled in comparison to his niece and how, if the woman's
set-upon expression and the stiff way that she stood apart from her intended
were any indication- the woman seemed to like Quintus even less than he liked
her. If Aelia noticed the girl, she gave no indication, she merely smiled
regally and stepped gracefully downward from the carriage.
Paolina was last, and Maximus hurried forward
to take her arms and assist her with the step. His father-in-law noted that he
too seemed out of sorts. That was troubling- in the year since they had met,
Paolinus had come to depend on the man for a clear head in trying situations.
What could have happened to make the man so nervous? Then, as the Praetorians
parted, Paolinus realized what it must be. The emperor, Marcus Aurelius himself,
stepped to the front of the little group. Paolinus understood that, if he hoped
to advance quickly, Maximus would have to impress those in command- what better
opportunity than to show the emperor himself that he was capable of the work of
a general? That is, if his family were equally acceptable...the old man stood a
little straighter, praying to his ancestors that he would not disappoint them
all.
The emperor stood in front of them, as though
he were waiting for Paolinus to make some move. The man fought a panic. Should
he say something? Do something? There was another beat of silence. Then Aelia
took command.
"Hail, Caesar." She said, her voice
very soft and full of self-assurance as she dipped deeply toward the ground.
She did not attempt to take his hand- that was an act of equals. She merely
showed her subservience and respect.
"Hail, Caesar." Paolinus and his
daughter hastily murmured, approximating Aelia's movement. They glanced
nervously upward. The emperor had begun to smile. There! They had gotten it
right.
"Greetings." He said gently.
"Welcome. Dinner will be served very shortly...won't you join us?"
Paolinus marveled as the emperor himself
stepped forward with him at his left side, his daughter on the right. Maximus
and Paolina followed. Next, incongruously paired, were Fulvia and Aelia.
Finally, in the rear were Quintus and his father.
The elder Clarus watched the girl in front of
him very carefully. Was this the same Aelia whose honor his son had defended
the day before? But she was charming! Her appellation of the emperor had been
just right- and her posture and dress were impeccable. True, Maximus' wife was
undeniably a beauty, but it was a wild sort of loveliness that seemed trapped
by its silken wrapping. Lucilla was also pretty, but it was impossible to
separate her personal charms from the caché of her rank. Yes, it was Aelia who
truly shined that evening. Could she truly be a provincial? He doubted it. Her
manners were too refined. Almost wishing he were young again, the senator
watched her shapely figure sway as she walked ahead of him to the dining room.
His annoyance with his for delaying the wedding plans temporarily softened by
approval of the woman he had chosen to protect.
*****
The dinner went beautifully. After some
moments of embarassed silence the tension seemed to break and the conversation
flow freely. Marcus Aurelius was a very
simple man considering his status as the most powerful man of the world did of
his best to put his guests at ease. When he discovered that Paolinus and
indeed, Paolina too, loved philosophy, he truly warmed up and they began
talking in earnest. Maximus beamed on seeing how his wife coped so well with
the questions Caesar posed to her - replying intelligently, in a humble but
decisive way - and earning the monarch's praises more than once. Maximus
participated in that conversation but also shared his attention with the other
part of the table. It was clear to him that Quintus and Fulvia disliked each in
spite of Titus' attempts to build some trust between the intended pair. Aelia,
who was sitting between Maximus and the senator, talked with both of them,
demostranting herself to be a wonderful lady. Maximus could see the senator was
in awe of her and Quintus was pratically beaming....he too had guessed that the
only thing his father liked about Fulvia was the size of her dowry- and he also
noted his father's reaction to Aelia. In some way or another, all the occupants
of the table were happy - Caesar because had found new two people with whom
share his philosophical precepts; Quintus and Aelia because they could see each
other and even speak from time to time; Senator Titus because he was with his
son for the first time in seven years; Maximus and his family because all was
going well..- all except Fulvia and Lucilla, who seemed bored and almost angry.
Lucilla engaged Maximus in light conversation throughout the dinner and she
seemed annoyed by the smiles he shared with his wife.
After a couple of hours Maximus excused
himself from the table, explaing it was time for the evening inspection. Marcus
Aurelius gave him leave, approving how the young commander was performing his
duty, not forgetting it even during such extraordinary and pleasant occasion,
and saluted him with a cheerful, "Go on, Maximus, and don't worry I will
take care of your beautiful and bright wife." The young couple blushed
hearing the praise and Caesar laughted aloud. It was so refreshing to see true
emotions on their faces, instead of the
carefully controlled and calculating ones he was used to seeing in Rome!
Maximus left the tent and went to perform his
inspection, unaware that Lucilla had left the table a few minutes after him,
saying she had to take a tonic in her tent. In reality she wanted to speak
alone with him. She could not believe he had forgotten all that they had shared
in the past. She was sure a couple of her expert kisses would refresh his
memory.
*****
Paolina tensed as Maximus walked out of the
room. True, she had been enjoying herself up to that point, even though she was
not speaking with Maximus directly. Still, she had relied on him for moral
support, taking his gentle touches and warm looks as approval of her behavior.
As he dissappeared, her courage fled. Even Aelia was distracted. She was
telling a lightheared, and very ladylike little joke that she had overheard in
the forum when she was a girl, and Quintus and his father were listening
raptly.
Only Fulvia seemed as disenfranchised from
the little group as the lieutenant's wife. Noting this, and admitting to herself
that, regardless of Aelia's feelings, she would be seeing Fulvia quite often
after Quintus' marriage, Paolina tried to start a conversation.
"So, Fulvia Alba, how was your
journey?"
The woman's eyes narrowed, considering the
innocent question as though it were a trick. "Fine." She said at
last. "A rather uninspiring destination." The dig was aimed squarely
at Quintus and the little town. Seeing Paolina's frown, Fulvia seemed, at last,
to take pleasure in the conversation. "I don't see how you stand it."
She said, making a great show of yawning and focusing on a vase behind
Paolina's shoulder- as if the girl herself were not interesting enough to hold
her attention. "No culture. No company...and such oafish people- all
fancying themselves the ‘landed aristocracy' because they have a little
farm." The tone was innocent, but the gleam in her eyes proclaimed that
she knew very well that Paolinus was a farmer.
Maximus' wife felt herself shrink in the
chair. She had been unprepared for such meanness.
"Well, not everyone can live in
Rome." Was all she managed. "Someone must feed the empire, must they
not?"
"Indeed!" It was the emperor's
voice that broke in, temporarily distracted from his debate with Paolinus on a
treatise by Seneca. The emperor was no lover of life in the city. As a stoic,
he idealized farming. His interest in the topic momentarily stilled Fulvia's
attack. "Give me Gaul- Gaul and the open road!" He smiled
triumphantly.
Fulvia's thin lips stretch almost painfully
taut, her forced smile oozing with malice.
Aelia could not help but notice the
expression. *Pull back, cousin...* she warned inside her head. *this little cat
will catch you in her claws*. Having lived a while in Rome, Aelia knew very
well the type of woman that Fulvia was, and her heart filled with pity at the
injustices she knew her beloved would suffer at the woman's hands. She was the
only child of a rich merchant. Spoiled, motherless, and completely lacking in
self-discipline. To a girl who had been denied nothing, taunting Paolina for
her provincial upbringing was entertainment. Like a cat, batting at its prey
before the kill. Aelia shuddered at the thought of her beloved Quintus being
bound to such a woman. What other acts of cruelty would she contemplate when
her marriage to the Clarus house had made her social status more secure?
The emperor and Paolinus dropped back into
conversation again, and Fulvia's smile relaxed, readying for another parry.
"It isn't really the money so much as a lack of breeding...." She said,
as though her conversation with Paolina were a confidence to a trusted friend,
rather than an attack. "...everyone trussed up in their finest jewels for
a simple dinner....as though we would be impressed."
Paolina felt her whole face go hot, the pearls
that sat on her collarbone burning her skin like a string of flaming pebbles.
"I have to go." She said, abruptly
standing up.
Suddenly, every eye at the table was trained
on her movements. Now what would she do? She looked desperately to her cousin.
Gathering her composure, Aelia lifted her
hand in a quiet gesture that told the serving girl behind her "come
here". When she complied, Aelia whispered a brief instruction. The girl
nodded, and walked to where Paolina was standing.
"This way." She said, looking over
her shoulder. Not knowing where she was headed, Paolina followed.
She smiled a little when the girl pulled back
the tent flap of a bathroom. She was grateful for Aelia's quick thinking.
"Will you require assistance returning
to the triclinium?" The servant asked. Paolina shook her head ‘no'.
"Very well. I will leave you." With
a deep, respectful bow, the girl dissappeared.
Paolina looked around the little room
closely. Although it was "temporary", the bathroom was far more
elegant than the one that they enjoyed at home. She presumed, from the pipes
that slipped between the heavy velvet walls, that a type of running water had
been improvised in the room. The floor had been covered with smooth paving
stones and, atop that, a very fine rug from the eastern provinces. A little oil
chandelier hung from the center pole. It seemed so grand! How could anyone use
the bathroom in such a place? Paolina walked to the basin, preparing to splash
some water on her face and gather her wits before returning to dinner. And then
she heard it. Voices.
Maximus' voice....
24
Maximus finished his rounds of the camp, and
hurried back to the dinner, hoping to spend a few moments with his wife before
her time to return home.
He was nearly at the door, when he was
stopped by a praetorian guard.
"Lieutenant." the burly, black-clad
figure said, blocking his path. "There is a lady who would like to see you
indoors."
Maximus grinned. So, she had managed to slip
away. He never ceased to marvel at Paolina's resourcefulness. Grinning, he
followed the man inside.
"Here." The man barked in a
monosyllable. Gesturing into a bedchamber, he departed.
Maximus hesitated. This was the emperor's
family's quarters. It was not wise for Paolina to be here unescorted. His smile
faltering, he stepped through the door.
"Ah...there you are...."
His breath caught in his throat. It was not
Paolina. It was Lucilla. Her hair had been loosened so that it hung around her
shoulders, and her modest dining tunica had been exchanged for a filmier,
lounging dress.
"Well..have you nothing to say?"
She asked, quickly crossing the room. As he stood still, numbly staring at the
revealing dress, she raised his hand to her lips, kissed it, and then covered
it with her own. "No more congratulations...? No kiss?"
The last word was whispered very seductively,
her eyes meeting his boldly, lingering there, inviting action.
"Lucilla...I'm....married." He said
roughly, wondering why he didn't simply turn and run away.
"I noticed. Charming. I can see why you
like her- you've always been a horseman. She has nice teeth." Her own
white smile glittered as she laughed at her own joke.
"She's..." His voice trailed off.
He had no need to defend his choice to Lucilla. She was married as well.
"Spirited?" Lucilla offered for
him. "Intelligent? Kind?...tell me, *lieutenant*" she spoke the word
as if it were a reproach, "is she good for your career?"
*****
Paolina's departure signaled the end of the
gathering. Her fun concluded, Fulvia gathered her skirts with a yawn.
"Pardon me, Caesar." She said, committing two dazzling breaches of
protocol in a single act both by speaking to the emperor without being
addressed, and daring to leave a table before he had signaled the meal's
conclusion. Unlike Paolina, she could not claim ignorance of custom in
explanation. Only her own arrogance gave her such boldness. "I am still
quite tired from the journey and I am going to bed."
Without waiting for approval, she trundled
off, yet another serving girl trailing after her apologetically. Senator Clarus
winced at the breach.
"Forgive me, Caesar." he said, as
soon as she was gone. "I am afraid that Fulvia is used to....looser
circles. I will speak with her -"
Marcus Aurelius waved his hand dismissively.
"Do not think of it, Titus. There is no need to stand on ceremony on my
account. You know that. I admire women who speak their minds...as I was telling
Paolinus regarding his daughter, so refreshing to find a woman with opinions on
things she isn't mindlessly parroting from somewhere else." He smiled warmly,
noting with pleasure the way Paolinus grinned proudly at the compliment to his
daughter. "And you, my dear..." The emperor said, turning his
attention to Aelia for the first time that evening. "We have not shared
two words... tell me, my dear, do you share your cousin's love of
reading?"
Aelia blushed modestly, raising her eyes just
below Caesar's own, her perfect manners only sharpening the contrast between
herself and Quintus' bride. "Yes, Caesar but, alas, on less exalted
subjects. I am more a student of history and..." the flush deepened.
"I must admit, of poetry and fashion."
Although these topics did not particularly
appeal to the emperor, he warmed to the girl's respectful tone. "Well, my
dear, that too is admirable....I daresay the world would not be so pleasant if
it were filled only with wizened old philosophers." He favored her with a
smile, then, still grinning, he turned toward Paolina's empty chair. "Or
pretty young ones...." With a faint sigh of exertion, the old man rose to
his feet, signalling conclusion of the meal. "Well, my friends, I must bid
you goodnight, and thanks for a very pleasant evening...Paolinus, we will try
to collect your daughter and call the carriage around."
"Yes Caesar..."
The two men's voices faded as they left the chamber.
Aelia's eyes turned inexorably toward Quintus. Sitting between the pair,
Senator Clarus might have missed the look if the flash of one of Aelia's
earrings had not attracted his eye. He looked at the girl and then, slowly,
looked at his son. They seemed lost in each other's eyes, a palpable look of
longing passing between them. It was almost as if....
With a start, the man remembered where he had
heard Aelia's name before. In the letter from his son. So, this was the woman
he had wanted to marry. That explained the struggle. How could Quintus stand by
while the woman he loved was insulted so deeply?
No dowry.
No family.
Well, it was a shame, Titus Clarus confessed
to himself, pushing his chair back from the table. She would have been a
charming daughter-in-law. But, as much as he admired her, marriage was a denarii
and sestertii business. Fulvia would bring the infusion of cash he
needed to wage his campaign for consul and bring the Clarus family back to the
forefront of public life. Quintus was a dutiful son, and he understood that.
Duty was something his father had always insisted on, even when he was young.
He would not falter now. Feeling sorry for the pair, still transfixed by each
other's stares, he reluctantly pulled them apart.
"Quintus." He said, causing his
son's head to jerk away sharply. "The emperor and Paolinus have gone.
Mistress Aelia will need to be taken to her carriage." Yes, let Quintus
walk her there. His voice was very kind, softened by the memory of when he too
had been in love...
"Yes, father." He answered,
offering his arm for Aelia to take.
Grateful for the stolen moment, the pair
stepped outside.
*****
"..is she good for your career?"
The empress' voice seemed to echo in the small bathroom, and Paolina held her
breath. Why was her husband in Lucilla's bedroom? Was this the reason that he
could not return to her last night? Frantically, she pressed her ear against
the wall.
"What does that mean, Lucilla?"
"I mean are you certain that you want to
give up on us?"
"What 'us'? The blood in Paolina's ears
pounded so loudly that she could barely hear.
"I love Paolina."
"You love me."
Deny it! Paolina was screaming inside. Deny
it! Deny it!
But he didn't. He merely fell silent.
"Lucilla, we are from different worlds."
"You could be part of it if you would
let me help you."
"You are married...married to the
co-emperor of the Roman Empire."
"We've covered that....tell me Maximus,
what is it that you find so endearing about this little wife? Certainly not
money or breeding..." She smirked. "Or class... Her beauty? There are
plenty of beauties in Rome...I could find you one..." She laid her hand on
his shoulder. "A house on the Capitaline...we were happy once, Maximus. We
could be so again."
"We're going to have a child." Maximus
said abruptly.
Lucilla stared at first, and then she burst
out laughing. "Ah, yes...country stock. Well, I've always heard they were
great breeders....horses again, is it?"
Every stacatto beat of the laughter was like
a knife being pounded into Paolina's chest. In spite of her efforts the wail
that rose to her chest could not be contained. It filled the room, followed by
a series of deep sobs, and then a panic. The voices in the other room fell
still.
She had been heard.
Paolina lunged for the door, but it was too
late, footsteps in the other side of the hall were already hurrying toward her.
Where could she go? In a panic, Paolina noticed the moonlight shining in from
the hem of the tent. Could she make it?
*****
Maximus felt his lungs burning as he burst
into the bathroom next to Lucilla's chambers. "Paolina?" He called,
his voice tight with fear. He had heard crying in this room, he was certain of
it. He was even more certain that the tears had come from Paolina. What had she
heard? Would she understand why he had held his tongue?
"Paolina!" He cried again. He
scanned the room quickly, and just caught sight of a slipper wriggling under
the bottom of the tent. "Paolina!" he said again, rushing toward the
wall.
"Maximus, stop." It was Lucilla's
voice. She laid her hand heavily on his shoulder, preventing him from moving
forward. "You'll tear the tent down. Be reasonable...you are hearing
things."
He made an inaudible sound, looking
frantically toward the tent. "She was here." he said through gritted
teeth.
Lucilla merely sighed. "So, your
accomplished horsewoman is also a spy?" She teased. "Tata might want
to recruit *her* for the army..."
Maximus started toward the door, but she
blocked his way. Angrily, he pushed her aside, and she stumbled a bit, managing
not to fall.
"What is the meaning of this?" An
angry voice boomed.
Maximus looked into the angry eyes of the
emperor of Rome.
*****
Paolina ran as fast as her legs would carry her.
She ignored the curious stares of the soldiers that she passed as she ran.
Behind her, she could hear Maximus call her name, but she only quickened her
pace, running headlong for the gates, past the stunned sentries, and into the
night.
Paolina tried to outrun the pain in her
heart, but she was unsuccessful...Oh, how could she be such a fool?...how could
she not see how being married to her, to--what was it that Lucilla had called
her? A provincial farmgirl? --could ruin her husband's career? Paolina wished
that she could deny the words- that she could chalk them up to a jealous
rival...but she could not.
She was holding him back. He could be
general, or senator or....she shivered as though she had a prescient
vision...emperor-but not with her. She didn't even know how to address the
emperor! She and her tata would have stood outside the carriage all night,
shuffling their feet never knowing what to do if Aelia had not intervened. She
glanced down woefully at the mud-stained hem of her tunica. Even her dresses
were borrowed....
At last, Paolina's feet came to a stop. Her
lungs stung from lack of air. She was grateful for the pain, it diverted her
attention away from the throbbing in her heart. Closing her eyes, concentrating
only on breathing in and out, she allowed her little body to slump into the
tall grass.
It was a still night, chilly for late summer,
and clear. She thought she could see every star in the heaven shining down on
her. What would she do now? Maximus would come looking for her soon. She knew
him too well. He would assure her that what Lucilla said was untrue...he might
even make her believe it for a little while, but that did not change facts. What could she do? Leave- to go where? Divorce him? She
shuddered at the thought of living in a world with Maximus and not being able
to touch him or speak to him each day...there had to be an answer...but what?
*****
"What is the meaning of this?"
Marcus Aurelius' voice seemed to echo through the tent. Maximus quailed. He had
never heard the man angry before, and it sent ice down his spine.
"I...I..." he stammered.
"He lost his balance." Lucilla said
quickly, covering for him in spite of her annoyance. "I was standing in
his way."
The emperor gave Maximus a stern look.
"And what, may I ask, were you doing in my daughter's bedchamber?"
"Looking for his wife." Lucilla
supplied, quickly. "He thought she might have come with me to take a look
at the necklace we were discussing earlier."
"Did she?"
"No..."
The emperor stared at his daughter, and
Maximus wondered for a moment if he would call her on her lie, but he merely
offered a resigned sigh.
"Very well, my daughter. Good
night."
"Goodnight tata."
The old man raised his hand to be kissed,
then he nodded to the soldier. "Goodnight, Maximus."
"Sleep well, Caesar."
He continued down the hall.
Maximus watched him leave, and then he spun
on his heel. "She was here." He said, crossly. "Lucilla
you-" He bit his tongue. Now was not the time, or the place. He had to
find Paolina, quickly. "Maybe they went outside." He said tersely,
and took long strides toward the front entrance.
*****
"Where is Paolina?"
Aelia walked quickly to where Paolinus was
standing, glancing over her shoulder to watch as Quintus slipped quietly away.
"I thought she was with you, tata..Did she not return from the
bathroom?"
"I didn't see her....could she be with
the other women?"
Aelia shrugged, not bothering to voice how
unlikely she thought that would be. They were just turning inside when Maximus
and Lucilla burst into the little lane.
"Aelia!" the lieutenant said
quickly. "Where is my wife?"
The girl shrugged. "We were just asking
ourselves the same question. She is not with you? She went to the bathroom and
then..." She paused, frowning as Maximus turned to the empress and gave
her a harsh look that seemed to say "I told you so". He sighed, and
then whistled at one of the infantrymen that was walking past.
"Get me my horse." he ordered
tersely.
The man nodded, surprised at being hailed
insuch a manner. "Of...of course sir." he stammered, and then darted
away.
"Paolina is already gone." He said
to Paolinus. "There's no sense waiting for her here....I'll bring her
back."
The girl's father frowned. "Is
everything ok?" he asked.
"It will be." The look on Maximus'
face was determined. Still frowning, Paolinus shrugged. "Very
well....Aelia, have you said yout goodnights? I suppose we must depart..."
As the imperial wagon pulled away, Maximus
was mounting his horse.
*****
He knew where to go.
In spite of her unpredictable temper, she was
truly a creature of habit, and he knew that he would find his wife on her rock
overlooking the road. He tethered his horse at the base of the hill, and walked
up alone, wanting to sneak up behind her before she had a chance to run away.
He stopped, just behind a tree, and watched
her for an instant, his heart twisting in his chest.
She was shaking with sobs, her wild curls
fallen from their bindings so that they hung around her face like a dark halo.
Her dress was hiked above her knees, which she hugged tightly to her chest, and
her lovely face was streaked with tears.
"Selene."
She jumped, startled by his sudden
appearance. "Maximus." she answered miserably.
"Are you alright?" He asked,
settling down beside her. He reached to stroke her cheek, but she wrenched her
face away.
"Please go."
"No." reachig inside his pocket,
Maximus withdrew a little square of cloth, and he offered it to dry her eyes.
"I want to stay here with you...." He stared at her for a moment.
"Paolina...I don't know what you heard but-"
"I heard enough..."
"You didn't hear what I had to
say."
"I don't have to...Oh, Maximus. I know
that you love me...I know that you don't care that I am a...a provincial
farmgirl...but what Lucilla said was true. You will never be a great man if you
are saddled by me.
"I'm not saddled by you, Paolina. I love
you..."
"But-"
"But, you are forgetting one important
thing. I don't want to be a general, or a senator, or any other form of so-called
great man. I want to be your husband. I want to be a farmer, I want to take you
back to Hispania and settle down with our thirteen children and-"
"Fourteen." Paolina said with a
sniffle.
He flashed a smile, reaching for her face
again. This time she did not draw away. "Fourteen." He echoed slowly,
reaching forward and bestowing each tear-stained eye with a kiss." He drew
her close to his arms. "I want you, Paolina. There is nothing...nothing
that I want more..." He leaned forward and stroked her neck with his index
finger, counting the rythmic pulse beneath her skin. "You are my
friend...my lover...my wife..all that I ever need." Her body was limp from
weeping, and so, when he drew her tightly to his chest, she was like a rag
doll, shapeless and yielding. He ran his hands protectively along her
skin...her sides, her hips, her little bottom. "Selene..." He
whispered..."My sweet Selene...."
Snifing away the last of her tears, she
leaned forward to claim his mouth in a kiss. Nothing had changed. She was still
a liability. He was still doggedly ignoring the obvious- that whether he wanted
to be a great man or not, he was- that he was marked by destiny for some future
greatness that he could not stop...but for tonight that no longer mattered. He
wanted her. Her....
Paolina reached behind his neck and threaded
her fingertips through the clasp of his decorative leather armor. She unhooked
it deftly, stripping away the hardware so that she could feel the muscles
beneath his scarlet tunic. He was so strong...so warm... Paolina kissed him
again, her tongue flicking softly against his lower lip and, when his mouth
parted to allow her entrance, pressing deeper. Her hands continued to caress
his back, raking gently along his shoulderblades and spine.
Maximus returned her advances. He pulled his
fingers through her curls, lucking away the last of her combs and pins. Her
glossy locks fell about her shoulders in a curtain of black silk. He stroked it
gently, leaning forward to drink in her flowery scent.
"I love you..." He whispered
softly. His lips were nearly against his now, their noses touched end to end so
that they were almost sharing breath. "You....Selene...you...."
She made a small cry low in her stomach. It
was not fair for him to love her so much. She felt guilty... underserving...but
she would not deny a gift of the gods. If he was doomed to love her, she would
at least give him happiness.
Slowly, her hands slipped to his legs,
squeezing his knees gently, and then sliding upward, along the thick muscles of
his thighs beneath his tunica. She continued upward, pulling the garment with
her, until she reached his neck, leaning forward so that Maximus could help her
finally work the covering over his head.
Next she reached for the loincloth, but
Maximus stilled her hand, reaching instead for the clasps of her own tunica. He
kissed each shoulder before releasing the clasp, lowering the fabric very
slowly, caressing each inch of velvety skin before exposing it to the night.
His movements were unusually calm and controlled- nothing like the night of
passion they had spent the night before, but beneath his calm facade, the
soldier's heart was beating wildly. He spread the tunica like a blanket on the
rock, lifting Paolina so that she sat in the middle, and then he pulled the
loincloth away.
Paolina still marveled at the beauty of his
body. The sharply delineated planes of his muscles, the rigid urgency of his
desire....She trembled as he drew her to him, lifting her legs over his own so
that they lay on either side of his hips. Then, lifting her with his stong
arms, bring her forward and down upon his body.
She gasped, as she always did when their
bodies joined. Familiarity had not inured her to his magic, and she melted
willingly into his hands, grateful that his strong arms would move her, and
that he was not ashamed to take the pleasure that he craved. His hands rested
firmly on her little bottom, pressing her downwards, filling her so deeply that
she felt she must break, and then drawing her away. Torturing them both with
the threat of leaving her altogher then repeating the little cycle.
"Selene..." he moaned, his teeth
clenched with the effort of holding his own body in check as he maneuvered her
toward her release. "Oh Selene...never go..." He removed one hand
from her bottom, sliding it between her legs to stroke her most sensitive flesh
as he continued to plunge deeply inside her body.
Paolina's back arched stiffly, shuddering as
she neared release. Involuntarilty, the muscles of her sheath tightened around
her husband, and he cried out, barely able to contain his response
..."Selene ..... Selene..." he whispered it over and over, like a
mantra- urging her to completion, urging their bodies to find the moment
together. At last, when he thought that he could bear it no longer, she began
to shake and maon against him. With a final, piercing thrust he joined her in
completion, his body spilling its seed deep within her body as his exhausted
muscles trembled with release.
"Oh, my love..." he said, nearly at
a point of collapse. He laid back against the rock, drawing her with him so
that she lay atop him. He cuddled her closely, unwilling to lose the connection
of their bodies, or their hearts. "Promise me..." he whispered....
She raised her head a little, tilting it as she
looked into his eyes. "What?"
"Promise never to doubt my love
again...Selene.." he caught her hand in his own, and tranced with his
fingertips, tenderily memorizing each tiny ridge and hollow. "Never doubt
that I love you, and want you...and need you." Dropping her hand, he
cupped both sides of her face. "I could never want anyone else...you are
my perfection, Paolina...the standard by which other women are judged."
Paolina felt tears well up in her eyes again,
but this time they were tears of joy. "I promise." She whispered,
hugging his neck tightly. "Oh, Maximus...I promise." She lay back
down, listening to the hypnotic rythmn of his heart.
Finally, after a long stretch of tender
silence, Maximus helped her to rise. "I must take you home." He said
softly, his voice filled with regret. "It is late, and your father will be
worried."'
She nodded her assent, clamboring stiffly to
her feet and reaching for the rumpled tunica.
"I will come to you tomorrow
night." He promised. "I don't care what I have to stay or do...I will
be with you."
25
During the following week the life in the
camp was very busy. The Emperor wanted to inspect every inch of it and Maximus
worked like a mad to be sure that everything was in perfect order. He organized
drills and various types of contest to show the Emperor how well trained and
fit his men were, surprising the monarch when during a simulated arrival of a
help request, the legion was ready to march away in only two hours. Quintus
helped Maximus in everything and the command team earned great praises from the
Emperor: a big promotion for both of them was really on its way.
A couple of day after the dinner the news
that Publius was out of danger arrived to the camp and both Maximus and Titus
Clarus let out a relieved sigh. Quintus instead remained worried.....if Publius
was on his feet he could represent a danger for Aelia: the arrogant man might
want to avenge his 'honor'.
Publius' father went to the camp and asked to
speak with Maximus about the fate of his son's aggressor. He still wanted a
trial and a refund for the damages Publius substained, a broken arm and a
cracked jaw. Maximus explained the man they needed to wait for the arrival of
General Claudius, scheduled to return in five days, and the other accepted his
word and left satisfied.
Maximus watched Publius senior walk away and
with a sign he wondered how much longer he could keep the problem hidden. The
Emperor was a very intellingent man and soon he would know the truth. He turned
to return to his tasks and almost collided with another man.
He raised his head and his eyes met Marcus
Aurelius' ones.
"Caesar." he said bowing, as he
wondered how much the emperor had heard.
"Maximus. Would you care to explain me
what is going on here? Who was that man? And what trial he was speaking
about?"
Maximus set his lips into a grim line and
then told to Marcus Aurelius the same version of the story he had given to
Titus, hoping that Caesar wouldn't be too angry with Quintus and with him for
not informing him sooner.
In the end Caesar nodded and said,
"Liutenant Quintus acted honorably, protecting an innocent woman's
reputation from a man whom - from your description - does not deserve to be married to anyone, lest of all to that
wonderful girl, Aelia. However this fact can't be let pass without a
punishment....I am afraid your second in command will have to wait some more
time to get his promotion to legate." Maximus let out a relieved sigh
while Caesar went on, "As for yourself, Maximus, I appreciate your loyality
to your friend but also your desire to not show him too much favoritism....yes,
my boy, I noticed that Quintus is confined in the Praetorium unless he had to
help you with the drills."
Maximus lowered his eyes and Marcus Aurelius
clapped his hand on his shoulder. "I know that you've arranged a series of
cavalry manuevers today....Why don't you invite your family to see them? You
have not see much of your wife in these days and truth to tell I want to speak
some more time with her and her father. And of course, Aelia can come
too."
"Thank you, Caesar." said Maximus,
his eyes shining.
Marcus Aurelius smiled and added, "Go
now."
*****
Aelia, Paolina and her father were all in the
porch, having just finished their breakfast, when the messenger arrived.
The soldier jumped down and bowed to Paolina,
"Domina, I have a letter from your husband."
Paolina took the papyrus and read it quickly.
Her expression betrayed her emotions and Paolinus asked, "There is
something wrong, my dear?"
"No, tata. We have been invited to the
camp again. The Emperor wish for us to assist at the cavalry manuevers Maximus
scheduled for this afternoon."
"Oh." Paolinus was as astonished as
his daughter but recovered quickly, turning to the soldier and telling him,
"You can go. Tell to the Liutenant we will come in our own carriage."
The man nodded and went away.
When he was gone Aelia went to her cousin and
put an arm on her shoulders. "Don't be so worried, all will go well. We
will make sure that both Fulvia and Lucilla keep their mouths shut." Aelia
knew what had happened during their past visit and knew how inadeguate Paolina
felt in the other women's presence.
"Oh, and how do you plan to do
that?" Paolina asked.
"I don't know....maybe we can pull a
joke on them, or get their dresses dirty so that they have to leave to
change......What do you think?' Aelia said winking to the other girl.
Paolina smiled and said, "I like
it."
*****
The family arrived to the camp an hour before
the beginning of the drill and the Emperor went to greet them, demostrating he
really liked their company. He personally led Paolina and Paolinus to the
imperial box built near the field were the drill would take place while Aelia
followed behind together with Senator Clarus.
The girl looked around, trying to catch even
a little glimpse of Quintus, but he was nowhere in sight.
They reached their destination found that
Lucilla and Fulvia were already there. But this time the girls, Paolina in
particular, felt more sure of themselves. They had not donned elegant, silky
dresses - this was not a glamourous occasion - but simple clean clothes in soft
wool, perfect to protect them from the chilly air of an afternoon spent in open
space. In fact Aelia and Paolina's
garments looked much more suitable for the event than the overly-elegant
silky robes the other women had donned to impress and shame the cousins.
Lucilla and Fulvia looked at the newcomers
with a superior attitude and Marcus Aurelius, seeing that, praised the girls
for their common sense. He was also wearing simple, sturdy clothes. Aelia and
Paolina beamed and took their seats on the sides of the Emperor, as he asked
them to do, ignoring the glares from their rivals.
*****
The cavalry maneuveurs were fantastic. It was
really impressive to see how the 300 men and horses moved in the field
charging, stopping, pivoting as if they were one. Maximus led simulated
assaults and escapes, giving his orders by simply pointing his sword in various
direction or shouting brief clear commands.
The audience looked with awe at the simulated
charges, especially when the regiment gallopped full speed in their direction
only to stop and turn around at the last possible minute. Marcus Aurelius
applauded enthusiastically and all the group - except Fulvia who was bored -
followed his example.
Paolina was tranfixed by what she was seeing.
Not only Maximus was terribly dashing in his uniform with his helmet and armour
shining in the autumn sun, but it was very exciting to see him in control of so
many men who obeyed to his orders so readily, as if their were able to read his
mind. Paolina knew that was the result of a total trust in their commander and
once again she felt Maximus was destined to a great future.
After the drill was finished, the little
audience left the box and congratulated with Maximus -All except Fulvia, who
retired to her room, and Aelia who used all the confusion to sneak in the
Praetorium to find Quintus.
*****
He was in his tent, reading a scroll, trying
to ignoring the longing he felt inside him...Oh, how he wished to be in field
with the others! He knew that Aelia was visiting with Paolina and her tata and
he wanted disperately to see her. Still, he knew he could not leave his tent,
even if there were no guards in front of its opening. Maximus had told him the
Emperor knew about the fight, the trial and his confinment and so Quintus knew
he could not sneak out of the Praetorium without a good reason.
He heard steps outside his room and raised
his eyes from his book. His breath caught in his throat. Aelia was there, just
inside the tent flap.
Without speaking he stood up and in two quick
steps was on her, hugging her small frame with force.
"Oh, my love, Aelia, what are you doing
here?" He did no tgive her time to reply and went on, "It does not
matter.....oh, how I missed you!" They kissed with passion, caressing each
other face with tenderness.
"Quintus.." she whispered nuzzling
his neck.."Oh Quintus...I can't stay here long, but I wanted to see
you...How are you?"
"I feel well...very well now that I have
you in my arms." He smiled and hugged her again. They did not speak again
but savored their closeness and the feeling of their lips and hands on the
other's body and face.
Much too soon, they heard noises came from
outside and then Maximus giving orders to the stable lads. The party was
returning from the drill and soon the Emperor and the others will reach the
Praetorium. Aelia did not want to leave
her beloved but she knew she had to do it. She did not want to cause Quintus
other trouble. So they kissed once more, promising to see each other soon, and
then she left his tent, joining her family just in time.
Aelia smiled to herself, believing her
absence had gone unnoticed but she did not know someone had see her sneack out
from Quintus tent- General Claudius, just arrived from Germania.
*****
The general sucked in his breath at the sight
of the girl in the hall. He felt as though he were seeing a ghost- The same graceful,
curving figure, the same brown-gold curls, the same proud tilt of the chin. For
a moment he felt as though he had fallen back through time and was watching his
beloved late wife, Antonia, drifting through the halls.
"Sir?" his servant asked, after
their pause in the hall had become uncomfortable. "Is everything
okay?"
Claudius blinked. It was a trick of the
light, or an hallucination brought on by his exhausting journey. Antoinia was
gone. He had to collect himself.
"It was nothing...just a...a brief
headache." He lied.
"Can I get you a tonic, sir?"
"No...."
Claudius began striding purposefully down the
hall again. He couldn't help but glance at the doorway the apparition seemed to
have appeared from- Lieutenant Clarus. He frowned. Well, that settled it.
Clarus wasn't the sort of man to be dabbling around with pretty serving girls.
As for more animal comforts- when he found them, he certainly did not bring
them back to the command tent. Yes, he was simply seeing things. Sighing
unhappily, he continued forward.
*****
Rather than entering the formal triclinium,
the little group of observers was taken to a separate eating area which faced
the courtyard. It was open on one side, so that the cool afternoon breeze swept
in the room, while gauze panels kept the flies away.
During their first visit, Paolinus' family
had eaten military style- in straight-backed chairs around a single long table,
but this room was fashioned in a more Roman manner. The tables were arranged in
a U shape, opening toward the view of the courtyard. On the outside, long plush
couches were arranged for the men. On the inside, chairs were available for the
girls.
The emperor took the center couch, after a
brief moment of awkwardness, he directed Paolinus to his right, and to his left,
Senator Clarus. Maximus would share with his father in law after he changed his
clothes.
The girls lingered at the edge of the table,
unsure of where to sit. They were surprised when Lucilla, rather than accepting
the chair that was held for her by one of the servants, deposited herself on
the couch beside her father. It was not unheard of in this modern era, even in
proper Roman households, for ladies to recline at dinner, but they were still
shocked to see the empress herself adopt such behavior. They were more
astounded still when, her head raised as though she were second only to the
empress herself, Fulvia plopped onto the couch beside Senator Clarus, her head
reclining in the opposite direction so that she could whisper and giggle with
Lucilla. Sharing an uneasy glance, Paolina and Aelia each claimed an empty
chair- Paolina facing her father, and Aelia facing the senator.
As soon as they were settled, food was
carried in on broad silver platters.
Keeping with the "rustic" theme of
the occasion, the meal was meant to evoke the simple fare of a picnic. Cold
sliced meats, hearty breads, and brightly coloured fruits were stacked high on
plates, and arranged artfully in little baskets. The fresh air had made
everyone hungry, so there was little conversation as the diners
enthusiastically filled their plates and began to eat.
Paolina, her father, and the Emperor
continued their conversation on philosophy- Paolina growing alarmed to discover
that she was almost at the end of her knowledge, while the emperor seemed only
now to be getting started.
Lucilla and Fulvia kept casting glances at
the other girls and then whispering wickedly, while Aelia and the Senator spoke
of Rome. He was amazed at how much she knew. He had learned, from discreet
inquiries, what her station had been in the capitol, and the small part of him
that had been trained to patrician snobbery wanted to hold it against her. But
she was so elegant! Her features and carriage were so noble. It seemed nearly
impossible to reconcile her to her humble origins. Besides, he could clearly
see how the street knowledge she had acquired could be useful to a man in his
position- no wonder so many of the other senators kept company with women of
the lower classes. Although her information was out of date, she had keen
insights into the "why's of politics- why a particular grain bill was
doomed never to be enforced, which of the city prefects paid the crossroads
colleges to clean up trouble in their districts, and the popular images of many
of his friends and rivals.
The meal passed quickly, everyone eating more
than they should, and then falling to silence as they fought off waves of
drowsiness. They were all but asleep when a messenger strode into the room.
Paolina frowned. Maximus had not yet arrived.
Had he been "sidetracked" in the Empress' chambers again? But,
Lucilla was here, and she did not seem in a hurry to leave. With a sigh,
Paolina fought back her jealous suspicions.
"Caesar." The messenger said,
bowing very deeply. He leaned forward and whispered something in the old man's
ear.
Caesar nodded. "Yes, yes, yes...I will
see him immediately." He quickly rose. His haste, and the glimmer of
excitement in his eyes looked anxious.
"Lucilla, Fulvia- why don't you take
Paolina and Aelia to your quarters for a nap? You must be tired after so many
hours in the hot sun..." He noticed Paolina's look over her shoulder.
"Yes, my dear, I will tell your Maximus to send for you when he
arrives....Clarus, perhaps you could show our friend Paolinus the library?"
"Of course." The senator rose
quickly from his couch and moved toward the exit.
Lucilla and Fulvia were less hasty. They
shared a look of annoyance- clearly for the cousins' benefit, and then stalked
off, never looking over their shoulders to see if they were being followed.
The girls stepped into the large chamber
nervously. Paolina thought that the single tent would swallow their entire
house. In the center, very high off the floor and bundled down with nearly a
foot of silken quilts, was the empress' bed. From an entrance along the side
wall, burly servants were carrying in other cots for Fulvia and the other
girls. In the meantime, a small army of serving girls seemed to descend on the
two richly attired ladies, stripping away their garments, and applying light
wraps, removing the pins from their hair, smoothing down the curls, washing
their feet. Each slave seemed to have a separate job, as though Fulvia and
Lucilla were unable even to pick up a hairbrush or unfasten a clasp on their
own behalf.
Paolina and Aelia were simply attired. They
had no servants to fawn on their appearance, and so they simply unlaced their
sandals and climbed into beds.
Their pampering complete, the others also
retired to bed, and the lights were dimmed. Still the empress and her
conspirator did not fall silent. They continued whispering, saying the words
"Aelia" and "Paolina" louder than the rest, as if trying to
bait their guests into a confrontation. Finally, they were still.
"Do it..." Lucilla hissed.
Fulvia emitted another peal of giggles, and
then turned in her bed so that she was facing Aelia.
"Tell me, Aelia..." She said
sweetly. "Since I hear that you recently held a wedding...what sort of
honey cakes should I have made...there really isn't any flour in the provinces
quite as white in Rome and..."
"One doesn't use white flour in
honey-cakes, Fulvia." Aelia answered, her voice carefully modulated to
echo Fulvia's sweetness. "Though, unlike we provincials, I imagine you
have very little occasion to poke around in kitchens...if your heart is set on
white flour, you may wish to cook with dates- I hear they are particularly
sweet this season."
Paolina looked over at Aelia, impressed by
the coolness with which she deflected the other woman's strike. It was clear,
from Fulvia's tone, that she was aware of the girl's love for her future
husband. It sickened Paolina that, rather than jealously guarding her own claim
to the man's affections, Fulvia was more concerned with the insult of a poor
girl ever attempting to take the place.
There was silence again, and Fulvia shared a
look with Lucilla. "It is a shame that it didn't work out for you...not to
have any hopes of another chance...." She sighed in mock sympathy.
"My wedding is tomorrow you know..."
Aelia stiffened. She had not known. Quintus
hadn't told her. Still, she remained silent, the darkness hiding her bloodless
face.
In the shadows, Paolina could see Lucilla
nodding her head, as if urging Fulvia on. The girl's wicked smile gleamed.
"...oh, and that reminds me of another area in which I wished to consult
your advice ...I understand that you have considerable experience in the
area....You see, I have never been married before, and I am quite concerned
about tomorrow night. Tell me, is Quintus a gentle lover?"
Paolina's stomach tightened with rage, and
she watched her cousin's face, unable to believe that she could remain so calm
in the face of such an insult. She watched the string of emotions that washed
across the girl's face. Shock. Embarassment. Anger. Acceptance.
Fulvia made a little grunt of disgust.
"What? No answer? He must be even less memorable than I feared..."
She and Lucilla giggled again.
"Stop it!" Paolina could hardly
believe that it was her own voice sounding through the tent. The others seemed
surprised as well. They fell silent mid-laugh, their lower lips slightly ajar.
"What did you say to me?" Fulvia
sputtered, her face turning a furious red.
"I told you to stop!" Paolina sat
up and started across the room, but Aelia stopped her with a firm hand.
"Don't, cousin." She whispered.
"It's what they want."
Slowly, Paolina faltered.
"Don't worry, Paolina..." Lucilla
said coolly. "I'm not going to ask you about Maximus....I already have
enough first hand experience to form my own opinion."
Something inside Paolina seemed to snap, and
she lunged forward, grabbing the empress by the hair and pulling her toward the
floor.
"Stop!" Lucilla screamed.
"Stop!!!"
"Paolina don't!" Aelia's voice was
just as frantic.
"That's enough!" Everyone froze.
It was the voice of Marcus Aurelius, the
emperor himself.
There was the sound of scurrying footsteps
and a slave relit the chandiliers in the spacious room. The light revealed a
comical scene. Fulvia and Lucilla, barely dressed in filmy nightgowns,
surrounded by burly Praetorians, Paolina, her hair once again reverted to its
wild state with a white-knuckled grip on the empress' arm, and Aelia, still
perfectly dressed, sitting demurely on
the edge of her cot looking horrified, but otherwise unruffled.
The emperor was appalled.
"I am ashamed of you Lucilla."
"But-"
He raised his hand, indicating that he would
accept no comments, "And I am disgusted by you, Fulvia. I have wondered,
for many weeks now, whether you were a suitable companion for my daughter. I have
determined that you are not. You will depart for your room immediately. I will
send your meals. Your husband- poor man- will need to arrange separate return
transportation to Rome."
"Y-yes Caesar." Fulvia stammered,
wide-eyed. She was caught too unaware to muster a smart comment and she trotted
off as she was told, looking like a large dog that had just been whipped. In
spite of being glad that her rival had been chastened, Aelia could not feel
true joy. Having a wife in the emperor's displeasure would be yet another
obstacle for Quintus' advancement....Aelia herself had already cost him one
promotion.
The ruler of Rome turned and watched as
Quintus' fiancé dissappeared down the hall, and then returned his attention to
the remaining girls.
"How much did you hear, father?"
Lucilla asked contritely.
"Enough." He answered. "It was
something about ‘honey-cakes' when I stopped to hear the answer."
The princess nodded glumly. Her father was
like a sponge for information. Languages, philosophy- even provincial cooking-
were all areas of interest. She had not been careful, and now she would pay.
"Paolina, your husband is in the dining
room."
Grateful for his pardon, the dark-haired girl
skittered away, clutching her sandals under one arm. "And Aelia..."
What to do with Aelia? Until he had overheard Fulvia's comment, Marcus had not
understood the implications of Quintus' actions at the wedding. Were the
lovers? Neither party seemed the type. In love? That, at least, seemed likely.
While, as a party to a very happy marriage himself, he wished he could send her
to her beloved's arms, there were certain social truths that even an emperor
could not change. Fulvia, terrible though she may be, was a better match for
the young Lieutenant. Thoughts of anything else should be discouraged.
"Perhaps you should join your cousin?" He said in a kindly tone.
She nodded and skipped off the edge of the
bed. As she passed through the doorway, the Emperor's punishment of Lucilla had
just begun.
*****
Paolina heart hammered in her chest. The
danger of what she had just done finally beginning to sink in. She had attacked
the co-emperor's wife!!! This could not be good for her husband's career....and
what if Marcus believed what he had heard? That Maximus and Lucilla
had...had....
"Selene!" Paolina looked up to find
Maximus hurrying toward her, a look of concern on his face. "Are you
alright? What happened?"
She blinked, not understanding how quickly
news travelled through the little camp, and confused by the question.
"Oh, Maximus...I...I hit her! I don't
know why, I just..."
"Shhhh...." He stroked her cheek.
"It's okay."
Still dazed, Paolina continued to babble.
"I pulled her hair! I was going to kill her I-"
She blinked. Had Maximus just flashed a grin?
She stared at him.
"It will be alright." He said
seriously. "At least the emperor saw the provocation...you must be more
careful! If the Praetorians had intervened, it could have been dangerous."
She nodded numbly.
"Come..." He said, drawing her
close. "let's go somewhere that you can calm down. We'll talk about this
later...in fact, your father might be ready to return home. Now that the
general is here, I can take you."
"The...the general is here?"
Paolina asked, quickly deducing what this meant for their friends. "Yes.
He arrived while you were eating dinner. That's why I was delayed."
"And the trial?"
"He wants to hold it as soon as
possible....probably tomorrow."
"Fulvia said she was getting married
tomorrow."
He swallowed. "Perhaps. Senator Clarus wants
the wedding to take place as soon as possible....his plans may have changed if
Fulvia has fallen into disfavor with the emperor."
Paolina eyes lightened. "Really? Then
perhaps Aelia-"
Maximus sighed and kissed her hand.
"Just because they don't have to marry other people, doesn't mean they can
marry each other. Aelia is still...."
She nodded, not needing him to complete the
sentence.
"Ah...here we are." Maximus steered
Paolina into some Spartan looking quarters. The dirty tunica and muddy boots on
the floor were the only indication that it had been occupied. She assumed,
correctly, that these were the quarters her husband had used while he was back
in the camp.
"Let's rest...we can worry about these
things later."
Feeling much more tired than she had when
retiring with Lucilla and Fulvia, Paolina complied, quickly falling asleep
against her husband's chest.
26
Aelia raced down the hall, hoping to catch
her cousin before she became hopelessly lost in the maze of corridors, but she
was too late. Slaves and soldiers ducked out of her way as she crossed through
the narrow passages. Turning a corner, she nearly careened into a tall man in
ceremonial armor.
He was as old as the emperor, though his face
seemed less kindly.
"Watch out, miss you-!"
Aelia started as the person addressing her
took both shoulders in his arms and held her still. She looked up, frightened
by the sudden, and unexpected stop.
The man stared at her."Who are
you?" He barked.
Aelia flinched, frightened by the harsh tone.
Had she done something wrong?
She didn't answer.
"What is your name?" He demanded
again.
Slowly gathering her courage, Aelia mustered
a reply. "A-Aelia..." She said in a very small voice.
"Aelia who?"
"Aelia Domitia."
His grip loosened a little bit.
"From Rome?"
"From the village."
Slowly, the man's grip relaxed until, at
last, his fingers were removed entirely. "I..." he looked at his
feet. "I'm sorry Miss I thought you were someone I knew..."
She stared at his face intently. Funny, he
*did* seem familiar. The eyes were so blue...they seemed to be connected to a
memory that she could not bring to the surface of her mind. "Yes..."
She said, her forehead creased with her efforts to remember. "I think that
you do..."
They continued staring at each other.
"Yes, well...." he shuffled his
feet. "From the village, perhaps."
"Perhaps."
"Good day, miss...be more careful."
She nodded. Then, sensing that the interview
was complete, continued on her way.
*****
Claudius watched her go, feeling the
prickling of tears at the corner of his eyes. So, it had not been an illusion.
This girl- the girl who could be Antonia's twin- really did exist. And here, in
Gaul, where they might meet by chance on any day! The gods truly did have a
wicked sense of humor. Collecting himself, he continued on his way.
Claudius had just come from a meeting with
the Emperor regarding the status of the treaty along. Things were not going as
well as he had hoped. The self-proclaimed ruler of the tribes was more than
happy to bargain with the Romans. However, in doing so, he had stirred up even
more resentment among the independents. They were gaining strength, picking
away at the fragile alliance, and pressing for another attack before the season
concluded. When he left, Claudius had been approaching a break-through- or so
he hoped. He secretly wished that the emperor would conclude his business
quickly and be on his way.
He turned into his quarters feeling very
tired and sad. He was getting too old for this. No- he caught a glance of his
sunken cheeks and powder-white hair in the hammered-metal mirror. He had been
too old for this for a very long time. The emperor was too kindly- and too
nearly at the same stage of maturity himself- to press the issue, but it was
true. Claudius no longer found pleasure in the battles or negotiations he led.
He remained in the army simply to avoid going home. Rome. There was nothing for
him there now. Once it had been his idea of heaven. It's curule chairs and
ivory thrones the ultimate aim of the bloody, scrapping campaigns he waged in
Germanian mud. It had once meant a sanctuary- the warm, welcoming bed that he
shared with Antonia, and the happy, laughing voices of his children Claudius
and the two Claudias...But the two Claudia's were dead- one in childbirth, and
one by choice. The suicide of the latter had driven Claudius away, and
Antonia...he shuddered as he remembered the girl in the hall...Antonia had died
of a broken heart while he was off claiming another three miles of useless
forest for the glory of Rome.
For what? He was at the end of his life and
had nothing to claim.
Treasures, to be sure- more money than his
agents could count, and a house that dwarfed all but the Imperial palace, but
it, like his heart, was empty. The possessions meant nothing, because he had no
one with whom to share. Still thinking of his lost family, Claudius went to the
little shrine in the corner of his room, lighting the oil lamps that surrounded
the statutes, and crumbling a bit of incense and salt into the flames. He ran
his finger along the cheek of the bust of Antonia- dearer to him than all his
family idols- which sat beside the arrangement. Finally, he murmured a prayer,
and walked away.
*****
Senator Clarus and Paolinus sat silently in
the library reviewing scrolls. The two men found each other's company pleasant,
thought they had little to talk about, and so reading was an occupation that
suited them both perfectly. After about an hour, the senator stood, poked his
head outside the door to glance at a sundial, and then sighed.
"You must excuse me, Paolinus. I'm
afraid that there are some matters I must attend to before sundown
...preparations for my son's wedding."
Paolinus swallowed, hard. "His
wedding....? Will it be soon?"
"Tomorrow."
The senator was startled by the little sound
of displeasure voiced by his companion. "Sir, are you all right?"
Paolinus waves away his attention.
"Forgive me...I was only thinking of little Aelia...the delay has almost
given her hope. She-" he clamped his mouth suddenly closed, embarassed for
having betrayed their secret. "I mean-"
"So...It is true. I am not mistaken- it
is your Aelia that my son had wished to marry."
Paolinus stared at the other man, wishing
that he could deny it, but the sadness could be read too clearly on his face.
"Yes...they think of nothing but each other. It is breaking their
hearts."
Clarus frowned. "Then he did not protect
her at her wedding...he was the agressor?"
"No!" Paolinus said hurriedly.
"I mean-" Quickly he recounted the provocation for the remarks:
Aelia's tearful confession of how the man had tried to claim her by force in
the woods on the night before their planned nuptials...and his callus remarks
in his home.
The senator listened to the words in silence,
and then he sighed. "I *AM* sorry." He said sadly. "Please know.
It isn't the girl...it's-"
"I know." Paolinus stopped him, not
needing to be reminded again that, while all the traits within the girl's
control were flawless, her fortune- a benefit bestowed only by the whims of
fate- was lacking. Paolinus stood and put his book away. "Please...conduct
your business. I will take the girl home- it will be better, I think, if she
does not have to see."
He rose and began walking through the door
when Rian, Claurus' little serving boy, burst into the room.
"Fulvia's been locked in her room!"
He said excitedly, undeterred by the sudden whiteness of his master's face.
"Lucilla too...the emperor is furious."
"What happened?" Paolinus demanded,
his thoughts springing instantly to his two girls.
The boy recounted the tale with gusto. Now,
having been passed through several tellings, the tale had been embroidered
nearly beyond description. In this version, Fulvia had alleged specific
instances of carnal knowledge between Aelia and her fiancé...but this had been
eclipsed by Lucilla's revelation- she was pregnant with Maximus' child!
Paolinus nearly ran down the hallway, barely listening to the end of the tale,
Paolina had attacked the Empress, injuring her so badly that the baby might be
lost, but when the emperor heard what had happened, he forbade anyone to give
her treatment. Paolina herself had been nearly killed when she was pulled off
of the beaten princess by the Praetorian guard. Viewed closely, of course, this
fantastic tale made little sense, but Paolinus did not have the luxury of
consideration. He ran through the halls as fast as his old legs would carry
him. "Paolina!" he cried frantically. "Aelia! Girls! Where are
you?"
"Right here, tata."
Aelia seemed to suddenly appear out of the
wall beside him. She looked very calm and collected. "What is wrong?"
She asked, noting the look of worry on his face.
"Where is Paolina? Is she still alive?
What did that..that..." he glanced warily at the Praetorians that lined
the hall. "What has happened to her?"
Aelia frowned. "What are you talking
about tata? Paolina is in Maximus' room. The emperor sent her there fifteen
minutes ago. She was fine..."
"And the empress, will she live?"
Another frown. "Is she injured,
tata?"
Slowly, Paolinus came to understand that the
story he had heard was not true. He worked hard to collect his breathing as she
began reciting- in as general terms as possible- what had occurred in Lucilla's
bedroom. She was just finishing her tale as the senator and his servant
arrived.
"Is she dead?" the little boy
asked, too curious to observe the protocol of not addressing a superior. Aelia
sighed.
"Perhaps we had better go home,
tata."
27
Paolinus and Aelia rode home together in
their own carriage. Paolina remained behind. She was well known as the Lieutenant-
no, Aelia corrected herself, remembering the announcement Maximus had made just
before they left- the *legate's* wife, and so remaining behind could work no
harm to her reputation. Still, Aelia wished she were not so alone. Paolinus
looked very winded from his run. His skin was an ashen grey and he was very
dull and listless on the ride home.
Aelia was surprised at how unconcerned she
was about the coming day. In the morning, Quintus would stand trial for his
attack on Publius. The proceeding itself would truly be a sham. The punishment
had already been decided. Quintus' rank as legate- bestowed only that day,
along with Maximus- would be stripped, and he would be placed on one month's
leave without pay. She was sorry for him, but knew that things could have been
much worse. In the evening, he and Fulvia would be married.
The wedding didn't bother Aelia anymore. It
wasn't so much that she had come to terms with it, as that she realized that
his being wed to someone else did not mean that she would lose his love. She
and Paolinus had not discussed her future, but she had arranged that in her
mind as well. She was well known in the little village for her taste in fashion
and her skill in arranging hair. Through her thrift alone, she had accumulated
a large collection of dresses and little pieces of costume jewelry. Paolinus
could not deny her the rest of her father's pension- a sum which might provide
a few month's rent- and she might be able to persuade him to give her the land
set aside for her dowry as well. She would open a little shop in the village-
small, but she was certain it would be successful. She would never marry, but
at least she would have an occupation- and she could spend her life surrounded
by the beautiful things that she loved. She was going to broach the subject
when they arrived home, but Paolinus hurried quickly to bed. He was feeling
achey, and out of sorts and needed the evening to relax.
*****
Senator Clarus saw his friends to their
carriage, and then returned to his room. The wedding plans were momentarily
postponed while he tried to decide what to do. What use was Fulvia's money if
her disfavor with the emperor blocked his plans to use it...? But then, if
Marcus Aurelius died and Lucius Verus took power.....He sighed, his heart full
of uncertainty. He knew better than to discuss the matter with his son. After
his conversation with Paolinus, the man was able to trace back through every
conversation and see how his son's actions had been tainted with love for the
pretty girl.
Besides, who needed a *another* reason not to want to marry Fulvia? He needed
impartial advice, and so he turned for the quarters of General Claudius.
The old man was sitting at his desk when
Titus was led inside.
"General." He said, respectfully
bowing his head. He was surprised by how old the man looked. When Titus himself
had served under Claudius- it was nearly 30 years ago now!- He had already
seemed old. Now he was practically ancient.
"Senator...how may I help you this
evening?"
"I'm on the threshold of making one of
my children bitterly unhappy."
"And you came to an expert for advice on
how to do it properly?"
Titus winced. Perhaps this interview had been
a mistake. He had come to the man for his reputation as a savy decision maker-
he had forgotten the man's unhappy family situation.
"I should go..." he said, rising
uncertianly.
"Sit down!...my, you are a nervous
lad." The general smiled, to let him know that he wasn't upset. "Tell
me your troubles...I take it that this concerns the incident today with his
fiancé and the emperor's daughter?"
"You heard?" Clarus was beginning
to wonder if he and Paolinus had been the very last to learn.
"Yes...bits and pieces. Several
different versions of the story, actually. One hardly knows what to
believe."
Briefly, he recounted Aelia's version of the
story, skipping the confrontation between Fulvia and herself, and moving to his
condemnation of her as unsuitable to be his daughter's friend.
"So the emperor has confined her to her
room, eh? That's hard..." He looked off into the distance. "On one
side, he is a just man...he might not hold the woman's behavior against your
son- or more importantly, perhaps, against you- Then again, he also has a very
good memory....I can see why you are concerned."
Titus nodded.
"And how does your son feel?"
The senator blinked, surprised that such a
practical man would take this into consideration.
"He doesn't like it," he said
miserably. "He's in love."
"Then by all means, go through with it.
If she makes him happy, why worry whether-"
"No, not with Fulvia, with
*Aelia*."
That name again. The general's thoughts raced
to the girl that he had seen in the hall.
"Then let him marry Aelia...is it really
so terrible to give him to a provincial, your other daughters-in-law are well
connected and Paolinus is not a bad sort of man-"
"She isn't merely a provincial. She has
no dowry to speak of, she isn't even Paolinus' daughter- she's his niece... and
she grew up as a...as a flowerseller in the forum!"
The senator was too distracted with worry
over the wedding to see the change on the general's face. "What did you
say?" He demanded.
"She was a flowerseller."
"In Rome?"
"Y-yes...why?"
Claudius felt his heart quicken. It couldn't
be possible....could it? He remembered a day nearly a decade before when he had
been in Rome. He was attending the senate meeting that morning to offer a plea
for new army for the twenty-third legion...a trifling matter, really. The
hearing had been delayed by a trial that lasted longer than it should, and he
had been half-heartedly poking through the stalls when he had seen it-
Antonia's earring, one of a set that he had given her on the occassion of their
engagement...only it wasn't on her ears. It was tied to a golden chain hung
around the neck of a fair-headed urchin selling roses by the road. Oh! He could
still smell the flowers- see the hints of his departed wife in the girl's
sweet, dimpled face...he could practically feel his heart beating loudly in his
chest when she told him that her father was nearby! She had promised to fetch
him and then...she had disappeared. He had waited until nightfall- after all
the other stalls had closed, and well after his appointment had passed-
standing by her little bucket of posies begging for her to return.
He had searched for her. He asked every other
vendor her name. He combed through each of the insulae, but he found nothing.
No trace that she had ever been more than a figment of his imagination save a
single bucket of wilted flowers. Could it be the same girl?
"I must go." He said abruptly.
Clarus blinked. "But you haven't-"
"Listen to your heart." the wizened
old general said, hastily grabbing his cloak and bounding for the doors. The
advice sounded half-hearted and trite. He clapped the man on the shoulder.
"And stall for as long as you can..."
*****
Claudius' groom was surprised to see the
general call for his horse so late at night. He rarely rode at all these days
when he could avoid it.
"Which way it is to Paolinus'
farm?" He asked quickly. The groom pointed out the road and informed him
of the turn.
"You could wait for Leiuten- I mean,
Legate Maximus...he's taking his wife back soon."
"His wife?"
"Yes...Paolina, Paolinus'
daughter."
Curiouser and curiouser.... "No thank
you, I wish to go now."
"As you say sir."
*****
Although he had little to gain with his
haste, Claudius rode as though pursued by the furies themselves. When he
arrived at the tidy little villa, his horse was slick with sweat.
The house was dark, as though the family had
already retired to bed, but it did not prevent his knocking.
"Paolinus!" He called loudly,
pounding on the wooded door. "Paolinus! Wake up!"
The man who finally opened the door looked
gravely ill. His skin was like grey paste and his movements were very slow.
"Yes?" He said, suspiciously, not recognizing the man.
"I am general Claudius...from the
camp."
"Maximus is not at home."
"I'm not here for Maximus...I want to
speak with you...about your niece."
Paolinus frowned. "Is there any
trouble?"
"No...." Without being invited,
Claudius pushed his way inside and pulled up one of the kitchen chairs.
"Sit down." He commanded. The man looked like he needed it. "Who
was Aelia's father?" He said, skipping all pretenses.
Paolinus shrugged. "Aelius
Antonius...one of the rankers that came through the camps when my sister was
young."
"*Antonius*?" Claudius echoed- his
late wife's name...could it be...? "And what did he look like?"
"Similiar to Aelia...the same hair.
Similiar lips..."
"The same eyes?"
"No. His eyes were brown."
The general's pulse was racing with
excitement.
"Why are you asking these questions? Did
he serve under you? Was he in trouble?"
Without speaking, Claudius reached into his
pocket and pulled out a square of silk. He unwrapped it carefully, revealing an
earring- the precise match to Aelia's bulla.
"He was a flowerseller?" Claudius
asked breathlessly. "In Rome?"
Paolinus slowly picked up the bauble, turning
the smooth gold over in his hand. "He...he stole this from you?"
"No." The men's eyes met nervously.
"He didn't steal it. I gave them to him. After his mother died....he was
my son."
Paolinus gasped and raised his hand to his
chest, and at first the General took it as a sign of his astonishment, but the
expression was wrong, almost a grimace, and his pale face had suddenly become
quite red. His body crumpled, slumping in the little seat. Claudius slapped his
cheeks firmly, trying to provoke a response.
"Paolinus! Wake up...Wake up!
Paolinus!" There was no response. "Help!" he cried out at last.
Very quickly, light footsteps pattered on the steps, and the girl he had seen
at the camp rushed into the room clutching an oil lamp in her hand, and a heavy
shawl around her shoulders.
"Who-who are you?" She asked,
wide-eyed as she entered the room, shocked to see the man again, then she
looked to the floor and saw Paolinus.
"Tata!" She cried. diving for the
floor.
"Someone needs to get a doctor."
Claudius said calmly. "I believe that it is his heart."
Aelia nodded, tears already streaming down
her face. She remembered his grey skin and the pangs he had reported before
bed. She had begged him to call the doctor, but he had claimed to feel better,
putting off the task for another day. "Call the stable boy...he is just
inside the barn. He will know where to go."
Claudius did as he told. When he returned,
the girl was still on the floor, he was pouring water into the man's
unresponsive mouth, listening futilely for the beating of his heart.
He was dead.
Aelia continued her frantic efforts in spite
of this grim reality, she worked his arms up and down, trying to coax some sign
of life, and she whispered to him desperately. "Wake up..." She
begged, her shoulders beginning to tremble. "Wake up. Wake up..."
Claudius felt a wave of pity for the girl.
She looked so tired...so lonely.
Almost subconciously, he bent to the floor,
gathering her into his arms. "He is gone." He said firmly, drawing
her hands away from the corpse. "There is nothing you can do. Leave him in
peace."
Slowly he lifted Aelia into a chair and
brushed the tears away from her pretty face. As he did so, he glanced at the
chain that hung around her neck. The bulla. The same that he remembered from
Rome. He had found her! His granddaughter! His Claudia! - but now was not the
time to explain. As inobtrusively as possible, he slipped the earring back into
his pocket.
"Who are you?" She asked again, as
her breathing came under control. She had passed from grief into a sort of
shock, the magnitude of what had happened too great to comprehend.
"General Claudius Domitius, commander of
the army camp. I believe I met you earlier- Aelia."
She remembered. In the hall. She nodded
numbly. "Maximus isn't here."
"I know."
"Then why-"
"I came to speak with Paolinus..."
he said half-truthfully. "I am very sorry for what has happened."
She nodded, too dazed to do much else.
"We must find Paolina." She said at last. "And Maximus at...at
the camp."
The general nodded, he would go as soon as
the doctor arrived. He did not want to leave the girl by herself in the house.
She stared at the man who had been like her
father for so long. Had he forgiven her? The thought plagued her mind. He had
so little time- and she had filled his last days with worry. She felt like a
wicked, unworthy girl, and began to cry again.
Claudius sighed, closing his arms around her
more tightly. He felt terrible to be so full of joy when she was in such pain.
He would make her happy again. He swore it.
*****
"Maximus....Legate Maximus,
sir....Legate..."
Reluctantly, the soldier's eyes came open. He
was disoriented at first. He was in his bed at camp, but Paolina was cradled in
his arms. He could smell the flowery perfume of her hair on the pillow beside
him.
"Legate -?"
"I'm here." he mumbled, sitting up
at last. Maximus squinted toward the tent flap where Cicero was standing with
an oil lamp.
"A message from General Claudius."
Maximus frowned and then, easing Paolina
slowly from his embrace, climbed out of bed and crossed the floor. He accepted
the lamp, still squinting to read.
Maximus exhaled sharply as he scanned the
quick, uneven lines, feeling as though he had been kicked in the gut. He took
several breaths before handing the note, and the lamp back to the boy.
"Get my horse." He said firmly, wishing, for once, that he had
Cicero's tasks rather than his own. "Go and borrow a cloak for Paolina-
Lucilla should be feeling very charitable after what happened today."
The boy nodded and then hurried away. Taking
a deep breath, Maximus returned to his wife.
"Paolina..." He whispered tenderly.
"Paolina, wake up." His wife stirred, but was as reluctant as he had
been to leave her sleep. He wished that he could let her continue dreaming.
"Paolina ... Selene ...darling, you have to wake up."
At last her dark eyes fluttered open.
"What is it?" She asked, frowning. "Why are you dressed..."
She looked from side to side. "Is it morning?"
"No..." He swallowed, his throat
feeling very dry.
"Then...?"
"Paolina...something very bad has
happened."
She felt her stomach tense with dread. Was it
Aelia? Had she harmed herself as she
had threatened?
Maximus stroked her hair away from her eyes,
fighting back the tears that pooled in the rims of his own eyes. "Oh,
Paolina..." He said, his voice breaking as he drew her to his chest.
"I'm so sorry..."
"What is it?" She asked, her voice
tinged now with panic. Why wouldn't he tell her what was wrong?
"It's your tata." He said at last.
He continued stroking her hair, holding her hand tightly.
He felt her body tense. "Is he
sick?"
The Spaniard's breath came out in a slow
shudder. "No...he's...Oh, Paolina. He's dead."
28
The little farmhouse was filled with weeping
that night, but not for the reasons that anyone had anticipated, Quintus'
impending nuptials and trial were all but forgotten as the household prepared
itself for mourning.
Paolinus' body was carried to his room and
placed into his bed. His daughters washed him and dressed him in his finest
tunic and whitest toga, then placed a coin in his mouth.
Maximus sent messengers to the farms of
Paolina's brothers. They would all come for the funeral. In the morning, he
would go to the town and inquire about the farmer's will.
Paolina, Aelia, and the female servants of
the house took stock of the storeroom and then began preparing the massive
amounts of food that would be required for their guests. They worked throughout
the night, nearly dead on their feet as the sun finally broke the horizon. At
last, Maximus sent them to bed. They both returned to their old room, the one
that Paolina now shared with Maximus, and collapsed numbly on the bed. Paolina
had not asked her cousin yet how this thing had happened, but neither girl
seemed inclined to speak. They fell into a dreamless sleep, awakening only to
the sound of the first brother arriving at the door.
Paolina ran downstairs to greet him and offer
support, but Aelia remained inside. She felt as though no one could truly
understand the depths of her grief. She was truly alone now. Paolina had
Maximus, the brothers each had children and wives. Soon- very soon she thought
sadly as she noted the long shadows on the lawn- Quintus would have Fulvia. She
had somehow counted on Paolinus to remain as the constant in her life. How
could he be gone? What would become of her now? Would she live with Paolinus'
older brother? With Paolina and Maximus? She cringed inwardly. Though she had
professed acceptance of her prospects at remaining a spinster, nothing could be
further from the truth. She still wanted love. Friendship. Company....was
service to her family the only thing that she could expect?
Downstairs, Paolina was scooped into the air
by the almost crushing embrace of her oldest brother. He was almost like a
father to her himself, and she gratefully accepted his embrace, as well as
those of his wife and children. She led them to the kitchen, then excused
herself to the washroom to splash cold water on her face. She was feeling very
queasy and tired.
*****
The day was spent sitting at the table,
reminiscing about Paolinus' life. Each knock on the door admitted another
brother, a cousin, uncle, aunt or friend with more warm memories to share. Only
Aelia did not join them. She remained in the bedroom, staring out the window
toward the hills, locking her pain inside.
The calls finally ended in the late
afternoon. The house was filled to its brim- every open space of floor seemed
to be littered with children in blankets. On the porch, her brothers sat on
campstools and the low surrounding wall, while inside, her sisters-in-law
crowded around the table, sharing the monumental task of cooking.
The knock on the door was unexpected, and so
Paolina did not answer it at first.
"Auntie..." one of the little girls
on the floor said, stirring awake. "Are you going to get that?"
Paolina nodded, finally noticing the sound.
"Yes, of course." Wiping her hands on her apron, she walked to the
door and opened it.
"Quintus." She said, shocked to see
him.
He gave her a sympathetic smile.
"Paolina...I...I'm here to offer my condolences to...to " he opened
his mouth as if to say Maximus, then shut it firmly. "To Aelia." He
ended at last.
Paolina nodded, opening the door a little
wider so that he could come inside. "Aelia." She called up the
stairs, waking two of three children in the process. There was no response.
"She is upstairs." She said, at
last. "She has not been down all day. First tata and then...she thought
you...you were supposed to be...I mean..."
"I had a wedding today."
"Yes." Had. Well, then it was over.
She gestured toward the stairway, suddenly not caring how it looked for a
married man to be alone with Aelia in a bedroom.
Quintus nodded at her in thanks and then
raced up the stairs.
*****